I knew eventually I would hit a roadblock that I would have to find a way to overcome and the time has come. I scheduled an appointment with my doctor to receive a hep b vaccine, and to set up a schedule to get the rest of my vaccines. Once my doctor went over my previous reaction and my chart she decided she was not comfortable giving me any vaccines. Ever. Ok, that leaves me with some not so great options. First, my doctor has scheduled me an appointment with an allergist. She feels that the allergist should be able to run some tests and determine the safest way to get these vaccines into me. This option requires the nursing program to allow me to have a waiver during the application process. Normally if you don't have proof of your hep b shot your application is dismissed. The nursing director at my school is talking over my situation with their clinical hospital and may issue me a waiver for the vaccines, but this is done on a case by case basis and I would have no guarantee of a clinical placement all the way through the program. Thus, I could get through 5 of the 6 quarters of the program and then not have a clinical spot for the 6th quarter and have to drop out.

My second option is to find another dr's office that accepts my insurance and just not mention my previous reaction. This is by far the most dangerous. I have scar tissue surrounding my brain from the first reaction. And we don't really know what caused the first reaction. It is very possible that an exposure to more vaccines could cause an immune reaction which could lead to anaphalactic shock, or the scar tissue swelling causing increased intercranial pressure... possibly death. It is my dr's opinion that any vaccine given to me must be done in the presence of a medical team and medical equipment ready to support me through a major reaction.

My third option would be to decide I'm not going into the medical field afterall. This is not an option I'm willing to consider. I will get my RN, one way or another.

So, I've got a lot to think about over the next few days. I am really hoping that the nursing director will call me back and say we have the green light from the clinical hospital for me to attent clinicals on a vaccine waiver and I can work with my allergist to slowly get these vaccines in as soon as possible. I still need to complete my functional resume and my personal statement. I've booked the babysitter to be spending a full long day with the kids and I should be able to knock these out durring that time.

Everybody cross your fingers for me!

I started this blog for a couple reasons. First, I wanted to be able to look back and see what I have accomplished. I don't share a lot of personal details here, I save those for my private blog, but I wanted to be able to look back at what my pre-reqs and (hopefully) nursing classes were like for me. Second, I wanted my blog to be a source of information and inspiration for others considering going back to school. Whether they were going back to school for nursing or underwater basket weaving. Being a wife and mother and care giver and taking the leap to go back to school too... it can be overwhelming! So I hoped that I could share my experience, that yes it is overwhelming and when you start you have no idea how you are going to make it through. But, you just need to take that first leap of faith and then keep putting one foot in front of the other. I think having the mindset that this IS what you are doing and not accomplishing your goal is not an option helps also.

With all that said, I decided now would be a good time to make a list of "What I Know".

It will be hard. Some things will be harder than you thought, some will be easier. It will be hard, but it will be worth every minute.

Ask for help. This was hard for me, I like to think I can do it all myself. the people at the financial aid office are your friend, they want to see you succeed. I promise. Go in, talk to them. Fill out the FAFSA, you may qualify for assistance you never thought you were eligible for. Then talk to your friends in the financial aid office some more. They may know of special grants offered by your college, and they surely know how to get in contact with the scholarship office.

Apply for scholarships. There are so many out there, find the ones you qualify for and apply! I never thought I would get the scholarships I have received. I was sure there was better, more qualified students out there. And, maybe there is, but they didn't apply.

Find the tutoring center. They don't let just anyone be a tutor. Allow them to help you do better in your classes.

Be nice to your instructors, but don't kiss up. You never know when you will need a letter or recommendation. And don't be afraid to ask them for some help too. Most instructors will bend over backwards to help you in their class... if you ask!

Please leave your cell phone alone while in class. I am amazed every quarter at the number of students who text all through lecture, then complain that the material is too hard and they just don't understand. It bothers those that are around you, trying to learn. No really, even if your phone is on silent. We still hear the keys and it is distracting when you are constantly picking up the phone, and putting it away again. We survived for many years not being in constant contact with our friends and family, you too will survive this hour. Disclaimer: By all means, if you have something unusual going on and you need to have your phone available, do so. But really this should be a once a quarter, if that, thing. I have 3 kids and a profoundly disabled grandmother that I am responsible for. I worry every time I have someone in the house taking care of them that I will get a call requiring me to rush home. It's happened once, it may happen again.

Take help where it is offered. You need to get the best grades possible. If someone offers to take the kids to the park for a couple hours so you can study... do it! On a similar note; kids, even small kids, can help with chores around the house. This is a good thing for them and for you!

I know there is more that I am forgetting, but I hesitate to offer too much advice for how to study. I have learned that I study very different than many other students.

Oh! One more. Always do your best. But, if it comes down to turning in a partially done assignment (or one that is done but not up to your standards) or not turning in the paper at all. Turn it in. Get the partial credit on the paper and move on. Hopefully you will have a high enough grade that you can coast once or twice.

I really believed sociology was going to be an easy, minimal effort class. It seems I was wrong.

There are 10 assignments due in the first week of class. And most are not quick assignments either. Ugh!

Tomorrow marks the first day of summer quarter. When I signed up for classes I was looking forward to a nice relaxing quarter. All of my heavy science classes are behind me, what would I have to worry about? Um, my sociology class seems to have an excessive workload. We are talking DVD's to watch weekly, along with essays and a couple other assignments... weekly!! Oh well, it will be over soon. And, as disappointed as I would be to knock down my GPA, most nursing programs figure your GPA only from your pre-req classes. So, I can lower my standards for this class. Yeah right.

I'm only a couple weeks away from having to turn in my nursing school application. Exciting! Scary! I am not looking forward to this. Logically I know that I have a good chance of getting in. And if I don't get in at my first choice, I have even better odds at my second choice. But still, it's hard putting yourself out there for others to accept... or reject. I've looked through the application packet, found myself overwhelmed and put it away again. So much is riding on these next few weeks!

Back to summer quarter. I will be enjoying the sun while studying sociology, medical terminology 2 and 2 typing classes. Hopefully this quarter will go smoothly, and I'll just be killing time until I get my acceptance letter!

Spring quarter is finally over! It felt like a sprint from the first week through the last day. never giving me a chance to stop and catch my breath. I wish I could say that I learned a lot. My grades seem to indicate that I did, but sitting here enjoying not having class today... I can't remember a thing I learned. I keep wanting to call this spring break, but no, this is my meager summer break.

Here they are, the spring grades:

• Microbiology 4.0
• Organic Chemistry 4.0
• Keyboarding 4.0

Yippee, another quarter I have not failed. I wonder when I will realize I'm not likely to totally flunk out of school?

This quarter has been harder than I anticipated. I suggest to everyone I meet on the path to nursing school.... don't take these classes together (organic chem and microbiology). Two challenging classes that don't tie in together with complementing information. Sure, they both are pulling heavily from information you learned in your previous biology and chemistry classes, but they aren't complementing each other. Both instructors are great, and I am learning a lot, but looking back I see better ways to have combined my classes.

Spring quarter is almost over! Then on to summer. Thankfully with just filler classes to make me look better to nursing programs. I'm almost done with my must have classes!!

Who knew I would be good at microbiology? The topic doesn't particularly interest me. In fact, I'm generally uncomfortable with a lot of the "what we can do and what we might be able to do soon" discussions surrounding this topic. I know I'm the oddball, but I don't necessarily think it's a good thing we can take a multivitamin when we eat a carrot because it has been genetically modified to have all these extra vitamins in them. In fact, genetic modification as a whole just seems very wrong to me. I am interested in diseases and disease processes. Learning the techniques used to identify a bacteria is interesting, though something I don't foresee utilizing in my career. Typically, if I'm not interested in a subject, I don't excel at the subject. So color me shocked that I currently have the second highest grade in the class after our first two exams.

As for organic chemistry...I'm fairly convinced that chemists have created this crazy naming system just to create job security for themselves. The long list of rules you must go through just to identify that the strange little drawing you are looking at is a 1,3-dimethylpentane, just seems a bit silly. And I dread lab every week. It seems you cannot have an organic chem lab experiment that doesn't include smells that you wish you couldn't smell while in the lab, and your nose burning and unable to smell anything else for days. There are several of us who have experienced nose bleeds, burning nostrils and lost ability to smell each week. And for what? So we can see that cyclohexene will react in the presence of bromine? And I will use this when?? Exactly, just as I assumed.

I do enjoy being at the end of my pre-reqs. And I also enjoy being known as someone who is competent in science. Hearing that more and more of my former instructors are sending struggling students to find me is a nice ego boost.