It feels like we are living in some sort of alternate universe. I am both stressed about getting everything done on time and feeling like the start of the program is so very far away.

There are still many things left to do on the to-do list. Honestly, the timing couldn't be worse. It's nearly December and Christmas is staring us down and the money is stretched so tight that it causes me to lay awake at night trying to calm anxiety. Is there enough money to do both a small Christmas and get all our supplies we need for the start of the program? If I wait until January will they have scrubs in stock in my required colors and fit? What about a stethoscope? Can I buy one locally or do I need to order one? Don't forget a watch... I must have a watch, and I keep forgetting it on my to-buy list. If I could feel like I had anything under control maybe it all wouldn't feel so overwhelming. We don't know our schedule for our classes/lab/clinicals yet and likely wont until the day after classes start. This makes lining up people to care for our children difficult.

Inhale. Exhale.

It will all fall into place. It has to.

Somehow, I anticipated having time to kick back and relax from the time I found out I was accepted until I started the program in January. This is not to be the case. There is just so much to try to do, and it seems like more is being added all the time.

I am currently working on my 7 hour HIV training as well as my HIPPA training. Next Monday I will be having my doctor fill out a form stating that I am mentally and physically able to participate in nursing school. Also, papers talking about my vaccination status. I have to turn those in, along with a copy of my insurance card. Still to do, CPR for the health care professional, background check, and drug testing.

We are having a meet and greet this Friday, and I am so excited to get to see my classmates! I am really hoping that we will be a very close knit group and enjoy each others company.

Also, although I don't feel the need to stress over 4.0's for this last quarter before starting the program... I can't just forget about my classes I'm currently enrolled in. Sociology the second time around is no more fun....

We received our letters of acceptance in the mail this weekend, as well as a long check list of tasks to complete before the end of November. Which was a little surprising since I thought we had until the start of the program to complete them. That's ok, just gotta come up with the money to get all this done.

The next 4 weeks will be spent getting our criminal background checks done, a health assessment performed by our physician, verification of all vaccines, CPR for the health care professional, 7 hours of HIV training, HIPPA training, and proof of medical insurance. I think that's everything.

I was planning to take the CPR course after finishing my finals in early December, so I'll have to move that date up. No biggie I guess.

I'm also on the look out for some good reference books to have before classes start. I'll welcome any and all suggestions.

Short story: I'm in! So is my hubby!

Long Story: We were told at the interview that we would be receiving word on Friday letting us know if we were accepted into the program or not. I set mind to going into the office around noon and learning my fate. Thursday after my math class I stopped into the biology department to check in with my boss. Not something I do every day, or even most days. I was shocked when she told me that the program receptionist had told her that one of the program advisers was making calls to notify people of their acceptance. I'm not kidding, the air left my lungs, my knees went a bit weak and I thought I might vomit. I think I managed to squeak, "But it's Thursday! I was supposed to have until Friday!" I headed out to my truck and tried to call Mike to let him know. No answer. I sent him a text instead. Next I called the caregiver at home with my grandma. Sometimes caregivers answer the house phone, sometimes they didn't. I wanted to know if she had taken a call from the school. Her answer left me with no further answers... there had been no calls. Oh no, that's bad. They didn't call.. I'm not in. But wait, they should have at least called for Mike, I'm sure he got in. Maybe they haven't gotten to us yet....

Usually I just head straight to the kids school and read for a few minutes until they are let out for the day. I deliberated between stopping in at home for 10 minutes or just sticking my head in the sand and going to the kids school as normal. At the last moment I decided to stop in to the house. It couldn't hurt anything.

I was chatting with the caregiver telling her what little information I had when the phone rang. I'm sure from the outside it was a funny picture. I almost answered the phone and then backed away saying, maybe I'll just let voice mail get it and call back later... or go in tomorrow. The caregiver pushed past me and picked up the phone. It was someone from the nursing department for me. Of course it was.

It sounds totally cheesy, but it was one of those moments where I was painfully aware that my life was on the pivot point, and in a few seconds nothing would be the same. I took the phone. "Crystal?" "Yes, this is Crystal." "Oh good, I almost thought you weren't there. I wanted to congratulate you on making it into the nursing program!" There was lots more blah blah blah from her end, there will be a formal letter sent and some other paperwork to fill out. But, at that moment all I could hear was blood rushing past my eardrums. I thanked her and hung up the phone. I made it! I simultaneously wanted to burst out of my skin in excitement and was scared to death.

On a much shorter note... the tutoring center where Mike works does not receive good cell signal. On his way home he found a voice mail telling him to call the nursing department at his earliest convenience. They had, of course, gone home by the time he heard his messages and he was forced to wait until Friday to hear his news.

I can't believe we were both accepted to our first choice school the first time we applied! We are the first husband/wife team to go through this program.

My fellow applicant that I took under my wing at the interview was also accepted! Mike and I are planning to set up a study group that meets regularly... possibly at our house. Our living room is big enough that we could cram all 30 students in our class in here to study together.

For better or worse, the interview is over.

I completely shocked myself by only having one brief moment of nerves. Totally shocking, and somewhat out of character for me. I walked into the registration with confidence and then sat back and enjoyed chatting with fellow applicants that I hadn't seen in awhile.

The program is accepting 30 students this time, and 46 applicants were brought to the interview. It was slightly daunting to see the competition. And... there were students there that I am not entirely sure how they managed to make it this far. I know it is horribly rude to say, but there are a few in particular that I will be insulted if they are accepted into the program and I am not.

So, I walked in with the attitude that I am going to be accepted to a nursing program, it's a matter of if they saw my worth or not. I feel I presented myself in a very positive light, and yet I didn't come across as pushy. I smiled and made eye contact.

I gave it my best, I'll just have to wait until Friday to see if I'm what they are looking for.

We were broken into groups for the interviews, and I was the only student in my group who called that campus home. As a result, the current nursing student who had been our leader was allowed to leave and I became in charge of getting my group from place to place on time. As I led my fellow interview-ees through the halls, I was greeted by other students who I have come to call friends over the last year, as well as former instructors. All knew today was the interview, and they all stopped me to wish me well and let me know they were pulling for me. For once, I didn't feel invisible and I was glad for the positive thoughts being given.

It was a good day. I hope Friday brings good news.

I love following the blog Post Secret. I sit on Sunday afternoons and read the new postcards, sometimes I laugh, sometimes I wipe a tear from my eye. I love the whole idea of Post Secret. This week the author shared that he was in a bookstore and picked up one of his books and found that someone had added this secret inside the book.

You shouldn't give up.
Fight for yourself and
who you are. You've got
to go through the worst
times in life to get the best

Very inspirational!

I thought I'd add it here to inspire those of you who stumble across my blog.

I've gone to find myself. If I should return before I get back, keep me here.

Anyone know where that quote originates from? I'd love to give credit where credit is due, but a (quick) google search didn't give me the answer.

At any rate, it's a very fitting quote for me these days. I hardly know if I'm coming and going, and my general answer for "what's going on tomorrow?" is "No clue." My husband was nice enough to write down the schedule that we should be following, if everything were going according to plans... which they generally are not. I refer to my schedule frequently.

Luckily for me, I have the worlds most understanding boss. As long as I keep her in the loop, I can come and go as I please. I have a weekly number of hours I try to meet, but it's no big deal if it doesn't happen. Which is a very good thing.

I started off the week hoping to work a couple extra hours early in the week so I could take this morning off. My kids school thought it would be a great idea to not have class on Thursday or Friday. Something about student enrichment, I don't understand it either. Instead of working extra, my week has gone something like this...

Monday: Things started out great. I got to work early, accomplished lots and left to pick up my youngest from kindergarten in a fabulous mood. All was lovely until I pulled in the driveway to drop my youngest with his babysitter for the afternoon. That was when the steam rose and the antifreeze fell. Crud. So, no math class for me that afternoon as I struggled to find where the leak had sprung from and fixed. the end result was no leak found, and no more leaking. I have the first self repairing vehicle.

Tuesday: Instead of heading to work bright and early, I was stuck home with a sick child. My middle child has decided now to be the opportune time to build life long immunity to the H1N1 flu. E-mailed my flu paranoid instructor and let her know I would not be making the test that afternoon and made arrangements to take the test before class on Wednesday. Instead made a trip to the doctors.

Wednesday: I'm back to work, sick kid or not. However instead of being able to work my full shift, I have to leave early to go take my math test. Calculator decides to die mid test. I manage without. Race off to kids school to pick up non-ill children. Drop kids off with afternoon sitter and race back to math class. Then back home to help my best friend/new housekeeper clean the house. Fall into bed exhausted.

Thursday: All things considered, today went ok. I worked, as I wasn't able to build up hours earlier in the week. Then grabbed the worlds best babysitter from the school parking lot (she goes to my school part time!) took her with me to pick up my kids from my house and dropped them all off at her house. She had things to do and my kids love playing with her baby sisters. Raced off to math class. After class I headed back to pick up kids, and managed to squeeze in time to visit with a friend before racing off again. Two trips to stores to find a red box with Monsters vs. Aliens, and we made it back home just in time to relieve grandmas caregiver. I caught a 10 minute nap on the couch before starting family movie night. Now we are chilling, waiting for kids to go to bed so I can steal back the TV and watch Grey's Anatomy.

Friday: That's in the future, and I know better than to predict the future. Something will fall out of the sky and throw my entire day, if not year, off course. There may or may not be a doctor appointment for a child, there should be work, beyond that is anyone's guess. I'm just thankful I don't have classes on Fridays!